U see, I got married to my husband on 11th Nov 2006. I was 27 and he, 36. 4 days to our traditional, he told me he was divorced a year ago. I requested to know what happened considering his age, he said infidelity. He got so worked up with the issue.
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After our traditional marriage, it was time for the wedding. He became very antagonistic. It became an issue of ‘no go areas’. I concentrated on keeping the peace in my home. 3months rolled by, he started mounting pressure on me on why I was not pregnant. I felt odd but kept quiet. It was the beginning of wahala. Soon my mum in law started calling. Later, the message from their ‘marabout’ was that I was I a big queen in the marine kingdom with so many children there. At first it was amusing to me. But it wasn't with my husband. He changed overnight and became unbearable. I became so ashamed of letting anyone know what I was going through.
I buried myself in prayers. Trusting God. At last after one year of pleading, my husband agreed that we visit a doctor. God bless me, after all the tests, no fault was found in my body. It was time for Oga. He started ‘posting’ the doctors. After about another year he went to see the doctor, as he told me. He came home with some medicine that looked like Paracetamol. I kept quiet. I was virtually scared of even breathing in my own home. Later we embarked on an IVF. We had 3 consecutive IVFs, all failed. That was the confirmation they needed to affirm that I was a witch. His mum even called my mum to suggest she takes me to perform some sacrifices in my village river, saying my village river is responsible for my ‘yet to conceive’, ironically my village nor get river o.
To cut the story short, I endured all manner of abuse from them before I finally threw in the towel. On the 18th Dec 2011, after 2days of severe beatings, I moved out. No one from his family (except his brother in warri) asked of me. It was a period I did not know I would survive. That period changed me. A month later I discovered I was pregnant, don't ask me how. My family wanted to tell them but I refused, I had several miscarriage in that house, was accused of eating the children in my womb. I insisted on keeping it away from them until I am delivered of the baby because I do not know what was behind the miscarriages.
On Aug 21 2012. I put to bed. Before I put to bed, I invited his elder brother and a friend of my husbands to come see me in the hospital. So that no one amongst them will say they never saw me in pregnancy. My ever arrogant husband never gave a damn even though I called to inform him. 6months later, he called me that he'll like to see me; I refused to let him know where I was living but requested we meet somewhere else. On meeting him he demanded to know why I did not tell him that I was pregnant. I told him it was an opportunity to prove to the world that I was not a witch and not barren. As usual he arrogantly told me that he never asked me to leave and that I can come home. I told him that the issue of my being a witch and leader in the marine world must be addressed by both families, if not it will continue. His wicked elder brother came to plead with my elder brother- for me to go back.
My family told them that the issue of witch craft must be addressed. Sometimes my husband will call asking me who I was having sex with. I became tired of his calls. Told my family to return his dowry, the family came pleading that I should not do that. Several phone calls followed too. May this year, I learnt he was sick. The same family came pleading for reconciliation. Finally I accepted, not knowing how sick he was. His nephew who was a doctor gave me a phone number to contact him (my husband) on. I contacted him (he traveled to Texas). He still did not tell me what was wrong but rather told me that he was very sick. I accepted his apologies. We spoke on daily basis but what got me scared is that he always ended his conversation with ‘’please wait for me, I’ll be back’’. I asked him why, he simply repeated it. His family members were calling to say ‘thank you’ to me for accepting him back.
We continued to talk on daily basis. But he never told me what exactly the issue was. He kept saying ‘’I'm very sick, I really need you, please don't leave me, wait for me, I'll be back’’. What scared me was that each time we finished talking he ends his conversation with ‘please wait for me I’ll be back’. One day, I called him several times but no response. Later, his nephew called me and informed me that he was placed under supervised care. That his phones and laptop were taken away from him. I knew my husband was gone. But they maintained their position. Days later, I was told to come down to see him that his body has changed. Then I believed he was still alive. I simply was scared of traveling not knowing what to expect. 2weeks later, I was informed that he was dead. The reason they wanted me to come over was that they couldn't retrieve his body from the hospital as he signed (in) himself as a married man…with my name as his spouse. I don't know how they eventually released his body. My sister, can you believe that the said family that was calling to say ‘thank you’ became monsters immediately their brother died. They denied that their brother ever had a wife let alone a child.
About 3weeks after my husband's death, his family led by his 2 elder brothers, an elderly man and a lady came to inform my family. My people asked them why it took them so long to inform me of his death. They said that they wanted to put his things together before informing me as, his things according to them 'were scattered everywhere'. I never held it against them. His elder brother was not straight forward with his responses to the questions from my family. He was asked when his body will be flown back. He said he did not know. Unknown to him that I got information on the movement of his body. The next day I left for Lagos to receive him the following day. It was at the airport I knew that this people were up to something. U see, because it was difficult to retrieve his body from the hospital where he died in Texas, they had no option than to accept my presence at the airport, in case the customs demand to see his spouse, whose name is on the death certificate.
My sister it was so unbearable seeing my husband cargoed back to Nigeria. He went for checkup but never made it back alive. The following day, they transported him down home and deposited him at iyi enu hospital mortuary besides my house. I was not ok with it but what could I do. It’s like a case of 'see your husband, marry am’'. 3wks gone, I did not hear again from my in laws. I called them pleading that we should start making burial arrangements. They told me that they have already started making the arrangements with my husband’s company, I was stunned. They also told me that they are building an edifice for me and my daughter. An edifice? the worst part is that my husband keeps appearing in my dream telling me to be strong and to keep fighting. when these dreams come, i find my self paralyzed in the dream and i cannot even move a limb or speak to him until he leaves and i wake up.
I went to Lagos and met with the chairman (board of directors) of his company. He was surprised, stating that he was surprised that my husband had a wife. I explained to him that we had a problem but have reconciled. He said not that. But before I met him, I already heard that it was being claimed that my husband never had a wife or any child. I called it mere gossip. But it finally dawned on me that the rumour was true. When I came to the office, the elder brother was mad and told the MD to send me out immediately. It was at that time, I filed a suit against them’’
Its been almost 2 years plus now and the court case is still on. they managed to get a lawyer to keep adjourning the case while they squander my hubby's money. Even if i win at last, they may have finished every thing. where will my baby start from when he grow up?
Some people has advised me to go Diabolical but i lack the strength. a great man of God down here called Ebube Muonso has prayed for me and assured me that all will end well but i am tired of waiting. i write to you because i know you have a massive readership. please help me share this. you are my only hope. publish my name and my email. I need people to come to my help. NGOs/lawyers or any Nigerian who has a conscience.
God Bless you
If you can help please reach her at Aliceokoli@yahoo.com
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